April 1, 2012

some-disgraced-cosmonaut:

Happy April Fool’s Day 2012!

Love, America’s Biggest

March 15, 2012
early-onset-of-night:

Saint Santorum would vigorously crackdown on internet porn.Most Americans probably don’t know this, but the majority of porn available on the internet is considered obscene. Therefore, it’s illegal. The obscenity laws in this country are just not enforced, mainly because, you know, they’re stupid and intrusive.If elected, Saint Santorum would enforce them “vigorously,” according to a statement on his website. It causes changes in the brain, he says (i.e., horniness). “Every family must now be concerned about the harm from pornography,” he tells us. Saint Santorum, you see, knows what we must be concerned with. The shit we are already concerned with? BZZZZ! Wrong. How am I gonna pay for medical care? Who gives a fuck. How am I gonna pay for college? Bite me. People, right now, are spanking it to porn!Saint Santorum for President. He knows what’s best!another source

Could someone with Photoshop make some Pilgrim Santorum pictures?

early-onset-of-night:

Saint Santorum would vigorously crackdown on internet porn.

Most Americans probably don’t know this, but the majority of porn available on the internet is considered obscene. Therefore, it’s illegal. The obscenity laws in this country are just not enforced, mainly because, you know, they’re stupid and intrusive.

If elected, Saint Santorum would enforce them “vigorously,” according to a statement on his website. It causes changes in the brain, he says (i.e., horniness). “Every family must now be concerned about the harm from pornography,” he tells us. Saint Santorum, you see, knows what we must be concerned with. The shit we are already concerned with? BZZZZ! Wrong. How am I gonna pay for medical care? Who gives a fuck. How am I gonna pay for college? Bite me. People, right now, are spanking it to porn!

Saint Santorum for President. He knows what’s best!

another source

Could someone with Photoshop make some Pilgrim Santorum pictures?

February 29, 2012
Rick Santorum's 'Google Bomb' problem has gone away - WSJ

shortformblog:

brooklynmutt:

I hope someone does something to rectify this. 

No it hasn’t. It’s just another, similar Google problem — which the WSJ doesn’t correctly note. Search Engine Land has a different, more accurate and … uh, frothier take on the matter.

(via shortformblog)

February 27, 2012
"I talked to the driver Tony Raines on Saturday and told him that since he’s starting at the back of the pack in the 21st row, I said, you know, let’s use the Santorum — let’s use the Santorum strategy. Hang back, let the other cars in front get in wrecks and — or drop out of the race, and then move up at the end. That’s hopefully the pattern he’ll use."

Rick Santorum, offering up allegorical racing advice to Tony Raines, the driver of the Rick Santorum-themed vehicle at the Daytona 500. The race has been delayed multiple times due to rain, the first time that’s happened in its history. (via shortformblog)

Would it be wrong of me to wish that the car crashes (the driver remains unhurt though) in a spectacular fashion?

(via shortformblog)

February 23, 2012
Google shows how debate hurt Rick Santorum - The Washington Post

No frothy mix in this article? Shame.

February 23, 2012
Activate the Mechanism!: Maureen Dowd from NYTimes takes a shit on Santorum, calling him Senator Sanitarium, a 'small-town Mullah'

marmoulak:

A great and hilarious article by the New York Times columnist Maureen Down about Santorum’s religious fanaticism.

Rick Santorum has been called a latter-day Savonarola.

That’s far too grand. He’s more like a small-town mullah.

“Satan has his sights on the United States…

(via abaldwin360-deactivated20130708)

February 21, 2012
Rant - Suburban megachurches

regazzadilupoinverno:

fiftysevenacademics:

This is something that really, really pisses me off.

The church in my previous post about Santorum is a perfect example of what makes me so damn livid. I lived probably one minute’s drive from it for years, so I got to watch it over a period of time, and was dragged inside it more than I’d like to admit.

These churches are HUGE. Charles Stanley’s church in Atlanta? I wouldn’t be surprised if it doesn’t have its own zip code. That’s all they do - eat funds and people and grow, like some bizarre weed. It displaces businesses, land that could be used to house people… and it just gets bigger and grander and fancier all the time.

First Redeemer (the church that was just visited by Santorum) is permeated by a sickening sameness. I can describe 99% of the families who go to it, and you can too, because it’s every picture of a “happy family” you’ve ever seen on TV. A middle-aged, trim white man in a nice suit, with a perfect, straight, white smile. His (usually blonde) white wife, who’s a perfect size, in her pretty Sunday best, with their kids, who are miniatures of their parents. You don’t generally see diversity of any kind… because I’ve seen what happens to people who don’t fit the “type”. Either they’re a person of color, or they’re not perfectly straight, or they’re not of the right class, or they don’t make much money - whatever their perceived “fault”, they’re shut out. Nobody would do it openly. Nobody tells them to leave. They’re just given the silent treatment until they decide that they don’t fit in, and they leave, at which point all the “perfect families” sigh in relief. That’s no hyperbole - I have seen it happen, and I have heard the talks that happen behind the scenes. 

These people flood in to the church every Sunday, where they listen to some preacher give a sermon that’s tailored so that people don’t have to think. It’s all very gentle, and designed to be as inoffensive as possible, so that when they need to they can slip things in that go along with the church’s politics. For example, how gay is wrong. And how wives should be the “little woman”. And how sluts are ruining the country, and how abortion is the road to hell, and every other system of thought and religion and, heck, country on earth is EVIL. And a blank-faced mass of people just drinks it in. And then, when they’re told to, they give. And BOY, do they give. I will give (ha) them that - the people that attend megachurches are generous.

They never seem to ask where it GOES, though. 

It goes to people like Santorum. It goes to all the far-right-wing political guests that come over. It goes to funding its own growth, and making the church prettier. It goes to programs that send their youth out to other countries to try and save the souls of those “poor people” that don’t know who Jesus is and who will therefore go to Hell when they die.

Where that money DOESN’T go? One exit down on the highway is a town that’s full of people who are struggling with real-world stuff, like feeding their families. There’s a school not ten minutes from that church where the teachers fund supplies from their own pockets, because the school is falling apart and it’s doing the best it can to pay its staff (who, by the way, are so underpaid it’s ridiculous). There is SO much that money could be doing; SO MUCH good - and it’s going into the pockets of GOP “guest speakers”. 

Does this piss you off? It should. It’s a picture of a community that values how it looks over the people in it. This church rakes in the dough, and they choose to give it to politics over their own schools, over the hungry in their own neighborhood. They would rather pay someone to come in and talk about the evils of contraception and abortion than to fund programs to make adoption easier, or to help ease the burden of women who may find themselves in need of an abortion.

They wear those “What Would Jesus Do?” bracelets, but they never seem to ask themselves that very question. They forget about the dude who said “love thy neighbor”, and who flipped out over the bankers in front of the temple. But dammit, they can recite selected parts of Leviticus at you in a second!

I don’t hate Christianity. I don’t hate Jesus. The guy had some good things to say. I just don’t think that if he looked at these kinds of churches, he’d be too happy. And given that he’s not exactly talking at the moment, I’m going to keep giving my money to awesome groups like Planned Parenthood, who ARE addressing the parts of the community that First Redeemer is going to continue to pretend isn’t there. 

And fiftysevenacademics NAILS IT.

Churches should have to pay taxes, plain and simple. I know that they’re politicizing from the pulpit - a clear violation of the First Amendment - so they have to pay up. Could you imagine the windfall if the Catholic Church alone paid property taxes? 

(Source: marionjravenwood, via ipomoeaj)

February 8, 2012
SANTORUM: 1) The frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex. 2) A huge fucking bigot who is never going to make his SEO problem go away.

Just doing my part to keep this the top hit in Google.

January 20, 2012
lucillebruise:

donnapirana:

stfuconservatives:

http://www.amazon.com/Matte-Nail-Polish-Santorum-Brown/dp/B006ULPRYW/ref=sr_1_7?s=beauty&ie=UTF8&qid=1327102774&sr=1-7
-Joe

“ManGlaze INK. began in 2006 as a stupid idea two best friends had one drunken evening after seeing the band GWAR. Upon sobering up the next day, they decided the idea was too stupid to ignore. This began their mission to create ManGlaze, a less girlie nail polish made to function well for men and appeal to foxy women. This stuff is badass, cruelty-free, toxin-free and made by hand in the good old USA.”
Hmmm…

OMG they retail for $6.66. LOVE IT.

lucillebruise:

donnapirana:

stfuconservatives:

http://www.amazon.com/Matte-Nail-Polish-Santorum-Brown/dp/B006ULPRYW/ref=sr_1_7?s=beauty&ie=UTF8&qid=1327102774&sr=1-7

-Joe

“ManGlaze INK. began in 2006 as a stupid idea two best friends had one drunken evening after seeing the band GWAR. Upon sobering up the next day, they decided the idea was too stupid to ignore. This began their mission to create ManGlaze, a less girlie nail polish made to function well for men and appeal to foxy women. This stuff is badass, cruelty-free, toxin-free and made by hand in the good old USA.”

Hmmm…

OMG they retail for $6.66. LOVE IT.

(Source: stfuconservatives)

January 6, 2012
quichelotta:

Spread santorum far and wide.

quichelotta:

Spread santorum far and wide.

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